DDT “SHINKANSEN PRO WRESTLING”, 18/09/2023
Nozomi No. 371 From Tokyo Station
75 Fans – Super No Vacancy Full House
1. Falls Count Anywhere Match: Minoru Suzuki defeated Sanshiro Takagi with the Gotch-Style Piledriver (37:29).
All aboard the bullet train! DDT had a show taking place in Nagoya today so the company decided to rent out one of the cars on the Shinkansen for a pro wrestling match between Sanshiro Takagi and Minoru Suzuki along the way. It is the latest of unusual Falls Count Anywhere matches between the two wrestlers, this one taking place five years after their empty stadium match that took place inside the Tokyo Dome. DDT promised not to do anything that would damage the train otherwise they would have to pay for the repairs.
The train departed from Tokyo on 1:09pm. It arrived at Shinagawa Station at 1:16pm where Sanshiro Takagi stepped on board. Everybody waited for Suzuki to appear but it turned out he was not there. Instead he was waiting at the next stop in Shin-Yokohama. Takagi used his spare time to go to the bathroom.
The train reached Shin-Yokohama Station on 1:28pm where Suzuki did in fact appear once the train started moving again, entrance music included. He explained his delay was because a staff member at the station saw him in his wrestling gear and scolded him for wearing that in public. At 1:32pm the match finally began.
Both wrestlers were given restrictions on what moves they were allowed to use inside a moving bullet train. The rules hardly limited Suzuki because most of his moveset is suitable for any location. Takagi however was robbed of a lot of his power moves that involve slamming the opponent. Suzuki also had a theory he wanted to test out. He calculated that if he throws a punch at 115km/h while the train moves at 285km/h then he will hit Takagi at 400km/h!
Overwhelmed by Suzuki’s physics lesson, Takagi called for help. Suddenly Takeshi Masada entered the car, fully dressed to wrestle. He came to Takagi’s aid and together they double teamed Suzuki down the aisleway. That was when Suzuki called his own help, his No. 1 Capsule Monster Hikaru Sato! Sato showed up wearing a virgin killer sweater and targeted Takagi for being an enemy of Suwama. However the four wrestlers fighting each other caused the train to shake so Takagi warned everyone to take it down a notch.
Suzuki refused Takagi’s warning and tried to give him the Gotch-Style Piledriver. The referee Yukinori Matsui tried to stop him by saying that kind of move is illegal inside the train. Suzuki told him he doesn’t care because it will be CyberFight getting blamed for the damage and not him! Takagi escaped and put Suzuki in a Sleeper Hold when suddenly Danshoku Dieno entered wearing an apron and offering the wrestlers some ice cream. Suzuki agreed to take a quick break so he could enjoy the treat.
However the ice cream served on the Shinkansen has a reputation of being rock hard to eat. That gave the wrestlers an idea to use the ice cream as a weapon but Matsui stopped them. It eventually became soft enough to eat but Dieno then started complaining to Takagi about Pheromones being forced to break up. He wanted to take his anger out by giving Suzuki the Lip Lock but Masada stopped him. Dieno then attacked Masada and kept punching him in the backside.
The next wrestler to show up was Jun Akiyama. He hit the Jumping Knee on Suzuki and Takagi jumped on top for a pin, only getting a two count. Akiyama then held on to Suzuki while Takagi brought out the Mecha Mummy rocket fist! He threw a 500km/h Rocket Punch at Suzuki but he ducked and Akiyama got hit instead. Akiyama got mad at Takagi and left in a huff. Takagi and Suzuki proceeded to fight each other back and forth using the rocket fist.
The fight was getting noisy enough to attract attention from the next car over. Kazunari Murakami stormed into the car to complain about it! He saw it was caused by Takagi and Suzuki fighting each other so he took his anger out on Masada and Matsui instead. Takagi paused the match so he and Suzuki could wipe the sweat off of themselves with a cloth so as to not get the train dirty. He then attacked Suzuki from behind and choked him with the cloth. Suzuki freed himself when he saw one of the passengers had a bento lunch box. He took the box for himself and started eating the food inside.
The match was then interrupted by the arrival of the ticket inspector. As he checked everybody’s tickets one by one, the people on the train began to realize it was Kenta Kobashi! Takagi and Suzuki did not notice him because they were too busy Chopping each other. It was only when they bumped into Kobashi and knocked his hat off that they found out who he was. Kobashi’s music played over the speakers and he chopped Suzuki across the chest after Suzuki complained about him taking the bento box away.
As the match went past the 35 minute mark, Takagi went for one of the few wrestling moves in his arsenal that he is allowed to use. He charged down the aisle and threw a Lariat only for Suzuki to duck under and apply the Sleeper Hold from behind. Suzuki then delivered the Gotch-Style Piledriver, pinning Takagi for the three count!
After the match Takagi thanked all of the fans and the media for coming to see the event. Today is the happiest Takagi has ever been in his pro wrestling career. He fought Suzuki at the Nippon Budokan in 2012, the Tokyo Dome in 2017 and the bullet train in 2023. There is now no better time for him to call it a day and announce his retirement from pro wrestling! A ten bell salute went ahead but at the seventh gong, Takagi suddenly admitted he was lying and then gave Suzuki the Stunner! He’s not going to retire yet not before he finally beats Suzuki. Whether it is on a deserted island, in outer space or on the moon Sanshiro Takagi will one day defeat Minoru Suzuki! He then ran off with Suzuki chasing after him.
Dramatic DDT 