Video – Yamashita/Saiki/Shirakawa Vs Itoh/Hikari/Miu

January 8, 2019

TOKYO JOSHI PRO “THE GOD OF PRO WRESTLING “MY ARMS FELL!” BLURRY CONFESSION”, 27/12/2018
Tokyo Kanda Myojin Hall
239 Fans – Super No Vacancy

Miyu Yamashita, Reika Saiki & Mina Shirakawa Vs Maki Itoh, Hikari & Miu


Video – Oishi/Hirata Vs Honda/Scott

January 8, 2019

DDT “WRESTLE OYAMA HYOTEI 2018”, 23/12/2018
Tochigi Koyama City Cultural Center
145 Fans

Makoto Oishi & Kazuki Hirata Vs Antonio Honda & Veda Scott


Video – Reika Saiki Vs Nodoka Tenma

January 8, 2019

TOKYO JOSHI PRO “WELL, MERRY CHRISTMAS! 2018”, 22/12/2018
Tokyo Itabashi Green Hall
260 Fans – Super No Vacancy Full House

Christmas Special 6 Big Single Match: Reika Saiki Vs Nodoka Tenma


Video – Sparky Vs Sento Minzoku

January 8, 2019

BASARA “BASARA 84 ~FEAST~”, 18/12/2018
Shin-Kiba 1st RING
244 Fans – No Vacancy

Sparky Vs Sento Minzoku!: Ryota Nakatsu, Naoki Tanizaki & Akiyori Takizara Vs Ryuichi Sekine, Daiki Shimomura & Minoru Fujita


Kasai Out Injured, Kikutaro In Healthy, STRONG HEARTS Staying, Space Monkey On The Way

January 7, 2019

DDT “DRAMATIC AKASONAE! 2019”, 13/01/2019
Osaka Hirano Community Hall

1. Toru Owashi, Keisuke Okuda & Tomomitsu Matsunaga Vs Akito, Makoto Oishi & Mizuki Watase
2. Antonio Honda & Jason Kincaid Vs Tetsuya Endo & Nobuhiro Shimatani
3. Naniwa 3 Big Single Match: Mad Paulie Vs Yuki Iino
4. Naniwa 3 Big Single Match: Kazuki Hirata Vs Maku Donaruto (w/ Phoenix Haru)
5. Mike Bailey, MAO & Kota Umeda Vs Masahiro Takanashi, Kazusada Higuchi & Sammy Guevara
6. Naniwa 3 Big Single Match: Konosuke Takeshita Vs Yuni
7. Tomorrow Is Good! Osaka Specialty Special Tag Match: Daisuke Sasaki & Soma Takao Vs HARASHIMA & Yuki Ueno

Jun Kasai is out of action with a knee injury, leading to a minor card shuffle for next weekend’s shows.

DDT “DRAMATIC ROKUMONSEN! 2019”, 14/01/2019
Osaka Hirano Community Hall

1. Kota Umda Vs Nobuhiro Shimatani
2. Soma Takao Vs Yuki Ueno
3. New Year’s Special Rumble: Toru Owashi Vs Kazusada Higuchi Vs Keisuke Okuda Vs Antonio Honda Vs Yuni Vs Maku Donaruto (w/ Phoenix Haru) Vs Kikutaro
4. Mike Bailey, MAO & Veda Scott Vs Makoto Oishi, Kazuki Hirata & Mizuki Watase
5. Masahiro Takanashi Vs Sammy Guevara
6. Humanity Is A Game Blooming In The Big Ring Of Naniwa! Osaka Specialty Special Single Match: HARASHIMA Vs Jason Kincaid
7. DAMNATION Vs ALL OUT!: Daisuke Sasaki, Tetsuya Endo & Mad Paulie Vs Konosuke Takeshita, Akito & Yuki Iino

Kikutaro has been added to the Rumble.

GANBARE☆WRESTLING “IF…2019”, 26/01/2019
Tokyo Itabashi Green Hall

1. Independent World Jr. Heavyweight Title: Shuichiro Katsumura (c) Vs Shota

Shuichiro Katsumura and Shota had two singles matches inside the tiny little Ichigaya Nankai Memorial Clinic during 2018. They are tied one a piece so when Katsumura won the Independent World Jr. Heavyweight Title it wasn’t a difficult decision to pick his first challenger. Their rubber match takes place inside a proper ring this time.

DDT “SWEET DREAMS! 2019”, 27/01/2019
Tokyo Korakuen Hall

1. Heisei’s Last Grudge Match Check: Yukio Sakaguchi Vs El Lindaman
2. Kota Umeda “Mad Dog” 7 Match Series – Final Match: Shuji Ishikawa Vs Kota Umeda
3. Special 3 Way Match: MAO Vs Masahiro Takanashi Vs CIMA
4. Special Tag Match: Daisuke Sasaki & HARASHIMA Vs Konosuke Takeshita & Shinya Aoki

The newest foreign wrestler to debut in DDT is Space Monkey! According to DDT’s write up he is a monkey born in Canada, was sent to a space centre in America for experiments, escaped back to Canada, was captured in the mountains and then sold off to numerous circuses. Monkey eventually ran away, started a pro wrestling career four years ago and somehow successfully pitched the idea to DDT to get booked by them. Monkey already has some notoriety among the Japanese wrestling fanbase. In 2017 he was nominated for Best Foreigner by the Nico Nico Pro Wrestling website.

Kikutaro will also be on the show.

BASARA “BASARA 87 ~FEAST~”, 29/01/2019
Shin-Kiba 1st RING

1. Union MAX Title: Ryota Nakatsu (c) Vs Fuminori Abe

Fuminori Abe thinks that he and Ryota Nakatsu are the two best wrestlers in BASARA right now so naturally they should be fighting for the Union MAX Title.

DDT “JUDGEMENT 2019 ~DDT 22ND ANNIVERSARY~”, 17/02/2019
Tokyo Ryogoku Kokugikan

1. Danshoku Dieno Produce OsuMAN Dankon Debut Match: OsuMAN Dankon Vs X
2. Go Shiozaki, Kazusada Higuchi & Yukio Naya Vs Daisuke Sekimoto, Toru Owashi & Yuki Iino
3. Special Hardcore 6-Person Tag Match: Sanshiro Takagi, Chigusa Nagayo & Ryuji Ito Vs Soma Takao, Mad Paulie & Takumi Iroha
4. KO-D Tag Team Titles – 3 Way Match: Mike Bailey & MAO (c) Vs Yukio Sakaguchi & Masahiro Takanashi Vs CIMA & Seiki Yoshioka
5. DDT Extreme Title – ??? Match: Shinya Aoki (c) Vs HARASHIMA
6. KO-D Openweight Title: Daisuke Sasaki (c) Vs Konosuke Takeshita

We haven’t seen the last of #STRONGHEARTS in DDT after all. Their home promotion OWE ordered the group to avenge their losses to DDT and not to come back until that mission has been accomplished. CIMA & Seiki Yoshioka have found their way into the KO-D Tag Team Titles match with the Moonlight Express and Shuten-dōji.


BASARA “BASARA 85 ~SHUFFLE~” Results

January 6, 2019

BASARA “BASARA 85 ~SHUFFLE~”, 06/01/2019
Kitazawa Town Hall
294 Fans – Super No Vacancy Full House

1. Yasu Urano defeated Masato Kamino with a Wristlock (10:32).
2. Trans-Am ★ Hiroshi & SAGAT defeated Takato Nakano & Tatsuhiko Yoshino when SAGAT pinned Nakano with the Goregrind (11:40).
3. Sento Minzoku Vs Best Stretchmen: Ryuichi Sekine, Daiki Shimomura & Minoru Fujita defeated Best Stretchman V3, Best Stretchman Amazon & Stretchman Man when Sekine submitted V3 with the Combine (11:40).
4. Takumi Tsukamoto & Jun Masaoka defeated FUMA & Yusuke Kubo when Tsukamoto pinned FUMA with a School Boy (12:38).
5. Isami Kodaka Returns To War: Naoki Tanizaki defeated Isami Kodaka with a Reverse Cradle (12:27).
6. NWA International Lightweight Tag Team Titles: Fuminori Abe & Ikuto Hidaka (c) defeated Ryota Nakatsu & Akiyori Takizara when Abe submitted Nakatsu with the O-Manjigatame (19:46).
*V3 for Fuminori Abe & Ikuto Hidaka.

Fuminori Abe sent his message loud and clear. By making Ryota Nakatsu submit he now wants a shot at the Union MAX Title! Abe admits he doesn’t know about the history of the championship or who has fought for it before him. But he thinks the two strongest wrestlers in BASARA are himself and Nakatsu. He has to beat Nakatsu to become the strongest and lead BASARA into the future! Nakatsu didn’t like hearing that because he thinks he is BASARA’s future. The title match takes place on 29th January.

The return of Isami Kodaka fro injury was spoiled by Naoki Tanizaki. When Kodaka avoided the Implant it led to a scramble of pins that Tanizaki got the best of, countering one Cradle into another for the three count. The defeat stops any immediate chance Kodaka had of getting a Union MAX Title rematch with Nakatsu. Kodaka said he feels the pain but this is pro wrestling. BASARA moved on while he was gone. It’s now his goal to catch up and overtake everyone else!

Takumi Tsukamoto held onto the back of FUMA’s pants during the School Boy to pin him. The two fought after the match and had to be pulled apart.

In Match #2 Takato Nakano went for a Swan Dive but SAGAT caught him with the Goregrind in midair for the win.


GANBARE☆WRESTLING “DO IT ON YOUR OWN HANDS 2019” Results

January 6, 2019

GANBARE☆WRESTLING “DO IT ON YOUR OWN HANDS 2019”, 06/01/2019
Kitazawa Town Hall
187 Fans

1. Ganpro Kicking Force Vs Momota Parent And Child: Mitsuo Momota & Chikara defeated Kouki Iwasaki & Shuhei Washida when Chikara submitted Washida with a Crab Hold (9:14).
2. New “Spring” Ganbare☆Joshi Fight Start!: Moeka Haruhi defeated HARUKAZE with the Diving Foot Stomp (8:55).
3. Rice-ha Vs Nan-ha After A Long Struggle, Tonight! We Decide Whether We Are Nori Or Nan! Ganpro Special Single Match!: Hiroshi Yamato defeated Baliyan Akki with a Fisherman Suplex (9:43).
4. Tsuru “Ken” Fight Club Vs Rotting Combination: Ken Ohka & Nobuhiro Tsurumaki defeated Shota & Mitomi Masayuki when Tsurumaki submitted Masayuki with a Wakigatame (11:03).
5. Elegy Of Pro Wrestling A-Class War Criminals: Minoru Fujita defeated Yumehito Imanari with the Samson Clutch (13:38).
6. Independent World Jr. Heavyweight Title: Shuichiro Katsumura defeated Keisuke Ishii (c) with the Ninja Choke (23:43).
*Keisuke Ishii fails in V7. Shuichiro Katsumura becomes the 28th Independent World Jr. Heavyweight Champion!

2019 in Ganbare☆Wrestling begins with a title change! Shuichiro Katsumura was taken to his limit by Keisuke Ishii until he countered the Double Arm DDT into the Ninja Choke for the tapout victory. Katsumura thanked Ishii for giving him another shot at the Independent World Jr. Heavyweight Title even thought Ishii already defended the belt against him last June. Katsumura also said that he now feels like he belongs in Ganpro. He nominated Shota as his first challenger because they are tied one a piece in singles matches. The match takes place on 26th January.

Although he lost the match, Yumehito Imanari talked about how much he idolised Minoru Fujita ever since he was a high school student. Imanari thought Fujita had a Lion Heart like Chris Jericho. Fujita shook Imanari’s hand but then gave him an Implant DDT and the Tombstone Piledriver. He doesn’t care what some fucking idiot from Ganpro thinks about him! Suddenly Moeka Haruhi entered the ring demanding a match against Fujita. Fujita accepted and tried to flirt with Haruhi. She kicked him in the face.

A bunch of wrestlers gave their new year’s resolution at the beginning of the show. Imanari wants to develop his own style of wrestling. Ishii wants to grow more as a wrestler and also help Ganpro become bigger. Kouki Iwasaki wants Ganpro to be the place to see frenetic fights. Shota wants to meet the expectations of his fans after having a bad 2018. Shuhei Washida wants to make up for the time he was away because of injury and become stronger in the process. HARUKAZE wants to have a whirlwind 2019. Haruhi was inspired by Imanari’s speech at Korakuen Hall in December and wants to show everyone the direction the company will go this year. Ken Ohka wants everybody to be themselves. Some of the roster may think they are doing this already but he wants them to really think if they are doing what they want to do in Ganpro. And of course, Ohka wants Ganpro to become a major pro wrestling league!


DDT “SHIMO-KITAZAWA FIGHTING THEATER 2019” Results

January 5, 2019

DDT “SHIMO-KITAZAWA FIGHTING THEATER 2019”, 05/01/2019
Kitazawa Town Hall
210 Fans – No Vacancy

1. Akito & Kota Umeda defeated Toru Owashi & Kazuki Hirata when Akito submitted Hirata with the Scorpion Lock (8:44).
2. 3 Way Match: Sammy Guevara defeated Antonio Honda and Gota Ihashi when Guevara pinned Ihashi with the Shooting Star Press (7:42).
3. Yukio Sakaguchi, Masahiro Takanashi & Tomomitsu Matsunaga defeated Tetsuya Endo, Soma Takao & Nobuhiro Shimatani when Sakaguchi pinned Shimatani with the God’s Right Knee (9:33).
4. CIMA, El Lindaman, Duan Yingnan & Seiki Yoshioka defeated HARASHIMA, Yuki Ueno, Kazusada Higuchi & Mizuki Watase when Yoshioka pinned Watase with the SK (15:19).
5. DAMNATION Vs ALL OUT!: Daisuke Sasaki & Mad Paulie defeated Konosuke Takeshita & Yuki Iino when Sasaki submitted Iino with the Cross Facelock (14:48).
6. KO-D Tag Team Titles & STRONGEST-K TAG Titles: Mike Bailey & MAO (K/c) defeated Makoto Oishi & Shiori Asahi (S/c) when MAO pinned Oishi after the Michinoku Tornado Driver (23:41).
*V2 for The Moonlight Express. Makoto Oishi & Shiori Asahi fail in V2. The Moonlight Express becomes the 40th STRONGEST-K TAG Champions!

The Moonlight Express are now double tag team champions! Makoto Oishi & Shiori Asahi set MAO up for the Cactus Flower in the corner but Mike Bailey crushed them from above with the Ultima Weapon. From there Bailey & MAO kept Asahi aside and pinned Oishi with the Michinoku Tornado Driver. MAO said Oishi & Asahi are two wrestlers he admires so he is pleased to have beaten them for the STRONGEST-K TAG Titles.

When the former champions left the ring, Shuten-dōji came out to challenge the Express. Masahiro Takanashi said it is only fair for a team from the same generation as Oishi & Asahi be the one to beat the Express for the belts. Tetsuya Koda decided to book the Express Vs Takanashi & Yukio Sakaguchi for just the KO-D Tag Team Titles at Sumo Hall on 17th February when suddenly #STRONGHEARTS came out! CIMA wants his group to be in the title match to make it more exciting. Hisaya Imabayashi offered to make it a 3 Way Match and CIMA agreed to take part with Seiki Yoshioka on his team. Sakaguchi asked Yoshioka who he is and if he is strong? Sakaguchi will fight him anytime. El Lindaman then stepped in to make fun of Sakaguchi’s blonde hair. The only wrestlers who have proper blonde hair are El Lindaman and Stan Hansen! Sakaguchi attacked Lindaman and the two were pulled apart. Sakaguchi then challenged Lindaman to a match on 27th January.

Daisuke Sasaki is all set on facing Konosuke Takeshita next month. Takeshita is on a roll after winning the D-Ou Grand Prix and pinning CIMA. But Sasaki is always on a roll 24 hours a day, 365 days a year! Sasaki wants to feel excitement for the next month so he wants Takeshita to have some fun with him.

So yeah, #STRONGHEARTS are sticking around in DDT after all. The unit appeared before Match #4 could begin. CIMA explained that they were going to leave DDT but he received a message from the OWE office in Shanghai telling them not to come back until they defeat DDT! So CIMA gathered everyone together to crash this show. #STRONGHEARTS challenged the participants of the match they interrupted to an 8-Man Tag Match. T-Hawk decided to not to take part because he had already wrestled earlier in the day, winning the WRESTLE-1 Championship over at Korakuen Hall. Team DDT accepted but ended up losing the battle.

Daisuke Sasaki & HARASHIMA Vs Konosuke Takeshita & Shinya Aoki was announced for 27th January.


TOKYO JOSHI PRO “IT’S A HAPPY STORY IN THE BEGINNING FOR WRESTLING IN THE NEW YEAR!” Results

January 5, 2019

TOKYO JOSHI PRO “IT’S A HAPPY STORY IN THE BEGINNING FOR WRESTLING IN THE NEW YEAR!”, 05/01/2019
Kitazawa Town Hall
236 Fans – No Vacancy

1. Maki Itoh defeated Raku with the Ito Special (8:44).
2. Yuna Manase defeated Himawari Unagi with the Neck Screw Hold (7:59).
3. Nodoka Tenma, Marika Kobashi & Pinano Pipipipi defeated Haruna Neko, Pom Harajuku & YUMI when Tenma pinned Neko with a 2nd Rope Diving Body Press (9:43).
4. Veda Scott defeated Yuki Kamifuku with the Fisherman Suplex (5:02).
5. Miyu Yamashita & Yuki Aino defeated Natsumi Maki & Hikari Noa when Yamashita pinned Noa with the Attitude Adjustment (9:18).
6. Shoko Nakajima defeated Mina Shirakawa with the Unmanned Local Train Hold (10:59).
7. Yuka Sakazaki & Mizuki defeated Millie McKenzie & Miu Watanabe when Mizuki pinned Watanabe with the Cutie Special (16:34).

Mizuki is relieved that the Magical Sugar Rabbits were able to win an intense tag match two days in a row. She couldn’t sleep last night because she spent all night worrying about today’s match. Tonight she will sleep well. Yuka Sakazaki was very impressed by the team of teenagers they fought, especially Millie McKenzie. Miu Watanabe was also happy to team with her. Watanabe has only been wrestling for a year but to team with a foreign wrestler and quickly discover chemistry with her this soon is encouraging. McKenzie called the match a wonderful experience.

Miyu Yamashita thinks she will have a singles match with Natsumi Maki sooner or later. It is the first time she found someone she wanted to face before they even wrestled. Maki would be happy to have the match if Yamashita puts the TOKYO Princess Title on the line.

Yuki Kamifuku took Veda Scott’s giant cat head hostage during their match. That only made Scott angry and more aggressive.

In her post-match interview, Maki Itoh apologised for her letting everyone down at Korakuen Hall yesterday. She thought she would surpass Hiroshi Tanahashi Vs Kenny Omega by becoming the new Princess Champion but failed. When the show was over, Itoh went to the dojo to figure out how Yamashita was able to escape from the Inverted Crab Hold. She practiced the move over and over until she figured out you can cross the opponent’s feet over each other to lock them together. She used this new move today and it works! The submission hold is called the Itoh Special and it does not resemble Tanahashi’s Texas Cloverleaf in any way, shape or form.


No Rest After January 4th

January 4, 2019

TOKYO JOSHI PRO “IT’S A HAPPY STORY IN THE BEGINNING FOR WRESTLING IN THE NEW YEAR!”, 05/01/2019
Kitazawa Town Hall

1. Nodoka Tenma, Marika Kobashi & Pipipipi Pinano Vs Haruna Neko, Pom Harajuku & YUMI
2. Maki Ito Vs Raku
3. Yuna Manase Vs Himawari Unagi
4. Yuki Kamifuku Vs Veda Scott
5. Shoko Nakajima Vs Mina Shirakawa
6. Yuka Sakazaki & Mizuki Vs Millie McKenzie & Miu Watanabe
7. Miyu Yamashita & Yuki Aino Vs Natsumi Maki & Hikari Noa

Natsumi Maki has given a statement over her situation with working for Tokyo Joshi Pro. She never had a written contract or any special terms with Actwres girl’Z. They were already given six months notice that she would leave the promotion and they accepted that until they found out she would take bookings with Tokyo Joshi in 2019. Tokyo Joshi had also been in contact with Actwres girl’Z about this before Yumiko Hotta went public with the news. Natsumi believes she is in the right over what happened and she did not break any rules or agreements.

Himawari Unagi gave herself a long term goal to beat everyone in Tokyo Joshi in singles matches. For her first one on one match she faces Yuna Manase.

DDT “SHIMO-KITAZAWA FIGHTING THEATER 2019”, 05/01/2019
Kitazawa Town Hall

1. Toru Owashi & Kazuki Hirata Vs Akito & Kota Umeda
2. Tetsuya Endo, Soma Takao & Nobuhiro Shimatani Vs Yukio Sakaguchi, Masahiro Takanashi & Tomomitsu Matsunaga
3. 3 Way Match: Antonio Honda Vs Sammy Guevara Vs Gota Ihashi
4. HARASHIMA & Yuki Ueno Vs Kazusada Higuchi & Mizuki Watase
5. DAMNATION Vs ALL OUT!: Daisuke Sasaki & Mad Paulie Vs Konosuke Takeshita & Yuki Iino
6. KO-D Tag Team Titles & STRONGEST-K TAG Titles: Mike Bailey & MAO (K/c) Vs Makoto Oishi & Shiori Asahi (S/c)

Jun Kasai injured his right knee during yesterday’s match and is unable to wrestle on tomorrow’s show. The tag match he was a part of is now a 3 Way Match.

DDT “DRAMATIC AKASONAE! 2019”, 13/01/2019
Osaka Hirano Community Hall

1. Toru Owashi, Keisuke Okuda & Tomomitsu Matsunaga Vs Akito, Makoto Oishi & Mizuki Watase
2. Antonio Honda & Jason Kincaid Vs Tetsuya Endo & Nobuhiro Shimatani
3. Mike Bailey, MAO & Kota Umeda Vs Jun Kasai, Masahiro Takanashi & Sammy Guevara
4. DDT Megaton Class 3 Way Match: Kazusada Higuchi Vs Mad Paulie Vs Yuki Iino
5. Naniwa 2 Big Single Match: Kazuki Hirata Vs Maku Donaruto (w/ Phoenix Haru)
6. Naniwa 2 Big Single Match: Konosuke Takeshita Vs Yuni
7. Tomorrow Is Good! Osaka Specialty Special Tag Match: Daisuke Sasaki & Soma Takao Vs HARASHIMA & Yuki Ueno

Konosuke Takeshita faces his greatest challenge yet. An 11 year old child!

DDT “DRAMATIC ROKUMONSEN! 2019”, 14/01/2019
Osaka Hirano Community Hall

1. Kota Umda Vs Nobuhiro Shimatani
2. Soma Takao Vs Yuki Ueno
3. New Year’s Special Rumble: Toru Owashi Vs Kazusada Higuchi Vs Keisuke Okuda Vs Antonio Honda Vs Yuni Vs Maku Donaruto (w/ Phoenix Haru) Vs X
4. Mike Bailey, MAO & Veda Scott Vs Makoto Oishi, Kazuki Hirata & Mizuki Watase
5. 3 Way Match: Jun Kasai Vs Masahiro Takanashi Vs Sammy Guevara
6. Humanity Is A Game Blooming In The Big Ring Of Naniwa! Osaka Specialty Special Single Match: HARASHIMA Vs Jason Kincaid
7. DAMNATION Vs ALL OUT!: Daisuke Sasaki, Tetsuya Endo & Mad Paulie Vs Konosuke Takeshita, Akito & Yuki Iino

Oh right, Maku Donaruto. I forgot about him. Don’t know how. That’s a thing one wouldn’t forget seeing.

DDT “SWEET DREAMS! 2019”, 27/01/2019
Tokyo Korakuen Hall

1. Kota Umeda “Mad Dog” 7 Match Series – Final Match: Shuji Ishikawa Vs Kota Umeda

Shinya Aoki and Kikutaro will be on the show.

DDT “JUDGEMENT 2019 ~DDT 22ND ANNIVERSARY~”, 17/02/2019
Tokyo Ryogoku Kokugikan

1. Danshoku Dieno Produce OsuMAN Dankon Debut Match: OsuMAN Dankon Vs X
2. Go Shiozaki, Kazusada Higuchi & Yukio Naya Vs Daisuke Sekimoto, Toru Owashi & Yuki Iino
3. Special Hardcore 6-Person Tag Match: Sanshiro Takagi, Chigusa Nagayo & Ryuji Ito Vs Soma Takao, Mad Paulie & Takumi Iroha
4. DDT Extreme Title – ??? Match: Shinya Aoki (c) Vs HARASHIMA
5. KO-D Openweight Title: Daisuke Sasaki (c) Vs Konosuke Takeshita

We have title matches. We have a special hardcore match. We have a beefy trios bout. We have whatever the fuck OsuMAN Dankon is supposed to be. Sumo Hall won’t know what hit it.